Quick update

Is it me, or is Jenna Fischer unbelievably attractive?

OK... Retorical. She IS.

I finished four seasons of the U.S. version of "The Office" in an embarrassingly short amount of time... mostly cause SHE is so damn hot. I bought all four seasons in Ecuador... I know what you're thinking. "Oh, man! I thought you were going to save money this time around."


HA HA!!!!

They only cost me 15 dollars, total! In your face. Yeah!!!! If you mess with the bull you get the horns. Just ask this guy.

Good stuff.

Sometimes the bull wins, and the Matador gets a free vasectomy.

Anyway... the moral of this blog is that Jenna Fischer is insanely attractive. Now, you may be asking yourself "What does that have to with a horrible bullfighting accident?". Well, if you can't figure that out, you suck!

Lick,

Ellert.

Ecuador!!!!!!!

Yeah! I'm in the port of Guayaquil (pronounciation, anyone?) at the moment and I'm quite literally less than one degree south of the equator. Life is still all goodness on board the ship. I played the two remaining production shows last week, and it all went without a hitch. The page turns are going to be a potential problem, though. Some of the charts are 20 pages long, each. But whatever, I'll deal with it.



I bought myself a camera the other day which, in itself, is not news at all... BUT!!! There's ALWAYS a BUT!!!



Picture this, if you would!



I'm in an electronic appliance store. The name of that particular store rhymes with Lady-o-smack. I pointed out a nice little grey sony camera to the young lady who was assisting me that cost around 130 dollars. Soooo.... the young lady goes to the back of the store and gets a box and hands it to me after we complete the transaction. Once I get back on the ship, I start unpacking the box to take my new toy for a test drive... Lo and behold. It's PINK... PINK, I tell you! Not even the kind of pink that can kinda seems like another color when the lights hits it just right. It's JUST PINK! Now to all you lovers of the color PINK, I'm not saying it's a BAD color. I'm just saying it's NOT my color... AT ALL! Why, oh, why did it have to be the one color that I really REALLY REEEEEEAAAAAALLLYYYYY didn't want it to be... It was one of those moments where you kinda just roll your eyes and say "AAAawwww NUTS!!" But I didn't say nuts... it was worse than that.



So the moral of this story is: Don't play drunken volleyball in the kitchen cause you'll sink the glass bust of Julius Ceasar that's hanging upside-down on the floor*.



This message was brought to you by the color PINK. Vaginas are pink... that's the extent of the good pinks in the world.



Oh! And merry christmas to you all. God bless us, everyone *cough, cough*



Ellert.

*Yes! You CAN hang from the floor if the whole room is flipped over. Suck it! HAH!

Well well well!

So I haven't blogged in a month... BIG DEAL!! Ok... sorry for yelling. No news is good news, I suppose. I'm doing 4 production shows per cruise along with some guest entertainer acts. We're adding shows 5 and 6 in a week or so.
There's a lot of "lifers" on board this ship (i.e. people who've been here for years) so it's hard to get to know everyone but that'll happen in time. It's probably the same feeling Tiger Woods had when he first started golfing... a bunch of white guys with clubs... damn... ok... sidetracking just a bit.
Concerning my updated status on Facebook... I'm not dating, I'm just not listed as "single" as I think that's something I should keep to myself.

We're sailing out of L.A. this week and last week as well for a week long cruise. Next sunday we start our southward journey along the coast of South-America. We basically visit every country along the coast of Latin America... Which excludes Bolivia and Paraguay, I believe.

I'll be more diligent with my blog from now on... I'm sorry to have kept you all anxiously waiting for updates.

Creamy,

Ellert.

Crystal Symphony

Well... I got here safe and sound.

The 2 shows I have done so far are AWESOME!!! My bandmates are really happy with me and I think there just might be a career here for me. I'll keep you posted.

Peace,

Ellert.

HOME!!!

I'm home! Jealous? Yeah I friggin thought so!!!

8 days!!!

I've got 8 days to go... and it's great... 192 hours. I'm also detoxing at the moment and it's going really well... I've lost 10 pounds already and I'm not finished yet... so I'll be a lean, mean Ellert machine when I get home.

Creamy,

Ellert.

19 days!!!!

I have 19 days to go!!!! I won't be home for 20 days though, because I'm flying east, which means I go an hour forward in every new time zone. So who wants to pick me up really early on the 18th of August? Any takers...

I'm awesome!!!!!

Ellert.

Update!!

22 days... I can't wait!!!!

34 days

enough said

Alles gudt!

Jaaaaa!

My plans just changed yet again. I got offered a gig... details will be posted soon because it's all a bit "hush hush" at the moment. Let's just say I'll be getting an 85% pay increase. Not too shabby. I'm ready to come home... 5 weeks.

I'm almost there.

I've been recording my songs for the past few days to pass the time now that my girlfriend is not here anymore. Her contract ended 5 days ago. We've arranged to see each other again, so we'll see what becomes of that.

It's official now... I'm going to Canada to visit some friends after my contract finishes. I'm staying with the Bozek family. I'm really grateful to have met them. They've been a good influence on me since I've met them.

Anyway... you all rock... just not as much as me!!

Ellert.

Vancouver

I'm sitting in a Café in Vancouver right now...

I'm bored...

random things...

pop into my head...

aaaaaaaanyway.....

I accepted another contract with my beloved employer. They gave me a 13% raise and a GREAT itinerary! It starts in february of next year in the Caribbean and then it goes to the Baltic for the summer with overnights in St. Petersburg, Copenhagen and Stockholm. I'm even thinking about extending because the ship goes to Iceland on it's way back to north america.

In other news... I'm still awesome and still number one.

Yet other news. My girlfriend is awesome as well... fuck yeah!!!

Life is good... can't complain.

mmmmm.... creamy.

Ellert.

I'm alive!!!

And kicking, too!!

Alright... first things first.

Til hamingju með afmælið, Halla!!

My little sister is 19 years old... I remember being 19 years old. I also remember not having a clue what I would be doing at 24... AND LOOK AT ME NOW!! HAHAHAHA!

I'm buying the last piece of my recording puzzle today, and then it's recordabonanza for me.
This week we get a little bit of change to our itinerary. We stop in Prince Rupert instead of Sitka... basically Sitka sucks because crew is not allowed off the ship and Prince Rupert sucks a little less because we are allowed off but there's nothing to do there. haha.
At least it's on less day on the ship... that's all that matters if you ask me.

All is good still... I'm starting a heavier gym program today. Protein shakes and the works. 4-5 liters of water per day... I'll be peeing like a racehorse... but whatever.

Anyway... my girlfriend is here now... gots to go!

Casanova OUT!

p.s. Hæ afi Hinni og amma Böggý! Ég hlakka til að koma í mat til ykkar þegar ég kem heim.

I've got a wonderful feeling... everything's going my way!!

New laptop? Check
Internet access? Check
Pro Tools up and running? Check
Sanity? Half check
Microphone cables and stuff? Check check check

Life is good!!!!

Fuck yeah!

I'm not giving up on my contract. I intend to see it through to the end (without extending) and coming home and putting this whole thing behind me. Hotels, hotels, hotels! That's where I am going next! I don't care what it takes, I'm getting that gig. Anybody who tries to stop me is in danger of getting seriously injured or even seriously dead!! SO BACK OFF!!!

Calming down,

Ellert.

Oh lord, won't you buy me a laptop.

Hey all!

I am now without a laptop... I got a bit too wasted the other night and ended up ruining my laptop with my drunken shenanigans. So posts won't be as frequent anymore, I'm afraid. I also injured my back the same night as I fell out of the top bunk in my room (about 170 cm) but I'm ok now... sort of.
I'm more than ready to go home. This cruise line keeps imposing new ridiculous rules every 15 minutes, and I'm ain't taking that shit sitting down. I happen to know that I can out-read any drummer in the fleet and I'm pretty sure I'm one of the top 5 overall drummers, too. So if they want to kick out the people who are really good enough do to this gig, good for them. They succeed. They're even running comercials 24/7 for the new ship on the crew channel now because nobody wants to be part of the crew on there... gee... I wonder why... assholes.

Alright... enough venting.

Ellert.

Ketchikan

Hahahahaha!

Sooooo...

We were all prepared to go bowling in Ketchikan. Little did we know that the bowling alley was non-existent. Alaska really hasn't developed since the gold rush. It's ridiculous. But I've only seen one port so far, so it's not really a fair judgement.
I went to a pub and shot some pool with a friend of mine instead. And the pub was less than a minute away from the ship. JACKPOT!! We just has some beers and chilled until the sail-away.
I don't know what it is but I must have been Canadian in my past life. All my closest friends on board are Canadians... ridiculous. Anyway... that's too philosophic. Let's keep it simple. :-þ
I tried two new beers today.. actually, I've tried a few new beers since I joined the Mercury. I'm going to list them and rate them.

Alaskan Amber 8.0 - A safe choice.

Alaskan Winter Ale 8.8 - Believe it or not it has a hint of chocolate, and it's awesome.

VB (Victorian Brew, Australian) 7.5 - no specific attributes... just a generic brand of beer.

Bohemia 9.5 - Really really good beer. Goes down smooth. Easily one of my top 5.

Coors light 7.5 - Another generic beer.

James Boag's 8.3 - A dark lager if there is such a thing. Tastes good.

Anthony Keith's 9.0 - Now I understand why the Canadians can't get enough of this.

Anthony Keith's Amber 9.3 - Orgasmic... that's all I'll say. I got kicked out a restaurant for sexual grunting when I drank this.

Red Stripe 7.6 - Really nothing to it. Why it's Jamaica's no.1, I'll never know.

Pike Naughty Nellie - 9.6 - It's brewed in the restaurant it's served in. OMG! people... OMG!! Another top 5 candidate.

Pike Kilt lifter 9.4 - This is a stout. Absoutely phenomenal! None of that tangy after taste that most stouts have.

I can't think of any others at the moment... I'll update the list as often as I can. what a cheap way to make the post look big, huh?

Lovely,

Ellert.

No news is good news!

Although the title of this post is absolutely true... I've decided to try and write a post every week. Even if it's not very interesting.

So...

The band I'm in right now has been called the best band in the fleet. We definitely have the best trumpet player. All the rest are just great professional musicians. We have a killer horn section which is going to stay the same until mid june, so no worries there. The piano player and bass player are leaving after the next cruise and they're being replaced by two newbies, so I might have to step up as the rhythm section leader and keep the band on the pedestal it's on right now.

I've been preparing a lot of songs and stuff for recording lately. I have some great ideas... although I am biased :-Þ

We're starting the Alaska season in two weeks, and I'm really excited about that. I'm going to take a helicopter ride to the top of the Hubbard Glacier. It's gonna be great.

The band is going bowling and zip-lining next cruise. It's appearantly the world's longest zip line and I'm going to take a video while I'm doing it. It's 1700 feet... which is about 520 meters, I think. That's friggin long. I haven't even been on a 50 meter zip line before, so it should be grand.

Lovely,

Ellert.

I've never been pushed through a door.

Hey all!

I just have one small story to tell you.

A few weeks ago, this idiot AV tech joined the ship and nobody liked him or his attitude.
He was constantly arguing with his room mate and one night, a few days ago he showed up to the room absolutely hammered.
He then asked his room mate (who wouldn't hurt a fly but is yet tall and big and shouldn't messed with if one cares about one's own future well-being) if he could borrow his voltage transformer. The room mate denied his request. So the new guy (a small guy by any standards) took the room mate's laptop and threw it on the floor and started kicking it.
The room mate got up and started pushing the new guy away. The new guy started throwing punches and the room mate didn't want to throw a punch back, knowing it would result in his immediate termination from the company. The new guy then manages to get the room mate by the neck from behind....

--------------THAT'S WHEN THINGS TOOK A TURN!!!!!!-------------

The room mate thought to himself "ok, enough child's play" and got out of the stranglehold and literally grabbed the new guy and ran him through the door of their room. Now these doors are not steel doors but there is a steel frame around the doors that should prevent these things from happening. Needless to say they both had meetings with the Captain and master of the ship, and guess what? The new guy got fired and the room mate stayed!
But the new guy was actually trying to convince everyone on the ship that he "won that fight"... yeah... right! At which point did he win?... maybe when he got pushed through a door... or maybe it was when he ran away instead of finishing the fight he appearantly was winning.

Lovely,

Ellert.

Yo what up, homies!!!

Hey, all!

Just checking in. I've been having a great time on board the Mercury, making new friends and renewing old friendships. We're sailing out of San Francisco at this point and going to Oregon, Washington and British Columbia (Canada). I bought myself some recording equipment the other day so I can get my ideas "out of the way"... ship life makes me write a lot more for some reason.
Right now I'm in the middle of a birthday party in the staff bar. The guy who's birthday it is right now came up to me today and read my name tag, which is nothing to report about but the way he read it was friggin hilarious. My name tag reads as follows: Ellert Sigurdarson... but he read: Ellert Sugardaddy!!! What the hell? illiterate americans... gotta love 'em.
Anyway, I'll write a more elaborate post next time. Time to go to work again.

Lovely,

Ellert.

I'm still fine!

Everything is fine on the Mercury!

I haven't really done anything really mind-blowing yet, so just sit tight and let the bedbugs bite... or something. I'm crossing the pacific in a few days and stopping in French-Polynesia, Cook Islands, Tahiti and Christmas Island. So lots of pictures on the way. But not until I'm in Hawaii. Otherwise it costs me too much, because they charge me 25 cents per minute on here. So fast typing is in order... hehe.

Anyway!


Ellert out!

G'day Mate!

Alright!

I made it in one piece... but it wasn't easy. My Icelandair flight to London was delayed an hour... ao I missed my flight to Hong Kong. The guy on the check-in desk for Virgin Atlantic was very helpful and let me make a fifteen minute phone call to the U.S., trying to get another flight straight away. It turned out that there was nothing available until exactly 24 hours later. So they booked me a hotel room at Holiday Inn... which was NICE!! So I got the same flight a day later. Turns out the only seat available was a Premium economy seat. ALL the legroom in the world and free champagne through out both flights, so I couldn't complain. The flight to Hong Kong took 12 hours and from there to Sydney took another 8. But, like I said, I made it one piece.

The band on board is awesome. The piano player, trombone player, trumpeter and alto player are all friggin awesome players. The tenor player and the bass player are really good, too. But those four are absolutely fantastic.

Anyway...

I'm in Melbourne tomorrow. And I have the day off. Swwwwwwweet!

Over & out,

Ellert.

I'm home!!!

I'm home...

nothing more to say about that.

over and out,

Ellert.

Happy new year!!!

So how was your new year's party? WELL SCREW THAT! Let me tell you about mine, instead.

As if playing santa on christmas wasn't weird enough.

On the 30th of december I was informed that either I or NOBODY would have to baby new year on the pool deck in front of 1600 people. I did SO NOT want to do it because it's excactly a musician's job, is it??? So they man-handle me into doing it by basically saying they'd make my life a living hell if I didn't.... So, on december 31st I get my costume... dear lord. It was very complex (NOT). It consisted of a diaper and a shit load of safety pins... that's it.
So at 9:00 pm I start drinking red wine and basically anything remotely alcoholic in order to have the courage to do it... at 11:40 pm I was up there, ready to go, and if you want the rest of the story, you're going to have to see me when I'm home.

HAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Always leave 'em hungry, right?

Ellert.